Be Still and Know...

"Be still and know that I am God." Psalm 46:10

I feel peaceful. Certainly not because I had a fabulously successful day at work or am all caught up on my work (only in my wildest dreams). Certainly not because my apartment is clean, (still waiting on the maid fairy to show up), and not because everything is right with the world. Clearly, as evidenced by the devastating destruction in Haiti, it is not. The peace I feel is only because of the God I know. My small group Bible Study started up again tonight, and it has set my mind in motion. We are studying about how to truly tune in to God's voice in your life, and the ways He intimately speaks.

My heart was incredibly convicted about how gracious God is to speak to us and constantly pursue us. There have been very obvious times God has spoken to me, and even more subtle, gentle times. There have been times I have been very in tune with Him and chosen to listen, and many more times that I have refused to be still and really hear His voice. Those times are often painful for me to reflect on, yet my joy comes from seeing how God has redeemed and restored anything that my brokenness caused.

At a church planting conference last April, Kevin and I heard Francis Chan speak about the Holy Spirit. It was a powerful message. (We LOVE Francis Chan, by the way. Author of Crazy Love and Forgotten God, and pastor of Cornerstone Church in Simi Valley, CA. You have got to listen to his sermons. Check out the link to his blog in my list!) The point that struck me that hardest was when he said, "You cannot be walking with the Spirit and sinning at the same time." How true that is, although often hard to admit. In that moment I was so convicted because I love God so very much. I am so thankful for the journey I have walked with Him, and I want nothing more than to be constantly in tune with His Spirit. I have a friend who has always told me that God is not a God of confusion. So the times that we often think are chaotic and crazy, confusing and complicated, we actually might need to take a hard look at how in tune with the Spirit we are, as well as how closely we are walking with and pursuing after God. Right when Francis spoke those words I began to reflect on my own life. Those times that I was crying in my car, imploring God to speak clearly to me I have to ask myself, was I doing things 100% God's way, or anything my own way, trying to ask God to bless that? It's a tough question, but one that holds a lot of revealing truth.

I am confident that when we sin we break the heart of our loving Heavenly Father. Because He loves us so very much. Yes, He is slow to anger and quick to forgive, but oh how I hate to hurt Him. How I hate to take for granted in any way the love that He has shown me and the many ways He has been so faithful to me. He never lets go, He continues to pursue. That's why it breaks my heart to think of the times I have sinned against Him.

So what now? Where do we return when we are brought back to our knees longing to be right in tune with our gracious God? For me, it has always started with being still; knowing, believing, and surrendering to God. My mind and my mouth tend to be moving an awful lot, so I know that when things are getting crazy and chaotic for me, this is right where I need to be. Still. Knowing, trusting. Not understanding, not making sense of things or figuring it out. Not having the perfect emotion or feeling. Just getting completely outside of myself and trusting beyond what I can comprehend or see. It is amazing how difficult silence can be when we are experiencing our most fragile moments. Evidence that silence and the freedom to release might be just what we need.

One of my most favorite songs, one that we played at our wedding, is by Steven Curtis Chapman. Here are the lyrics:

Be still and know that He is God
Be still and know that He is holy
Be still, O restless soul of mine
Bow before the Prince of peace
Let the noise and clamor cease

Be still and know that He is God
Be still and know that He is faithful
Consider all that He has done
Stand in awe and be amazed
And know that He will never change
Be still

Be still, and know that He is God
Be still, and know that He is God
Be still, and know that He is God

Be still; Be speechless

Be still and know that He is God
Be still and know He is our Father
Come rest your head upon His breast
Listen to the rhythm of His unfailing heart of love
Beating for His little ones
Calling each of us to come
Be still, Be still

Listen to it if you get the chance. Sit still and just let Him love you. "Bow before the Prince of Peace, let the noise and clamor cease...Be still and know that He is faithful. Consider all that He has done, stand in awe and be amazed, know that He will never change. Be still."