Zoe - 4 and 5 months

Sweet Zoe's 4th and 5th months were the craziest ever!  I always vow I won't say this, but I sure do wish I had done a better job of journaling and writing during that time.  But I was just trying to keep my head above water in a lot of ways.  It also was the end of summer, the beginning of a beautiful Fall and we were so busy having fun and exploring our new town.  I remember thinking when Zoe turned 4 months, then 5, how much she was changing and growing up, mostly in the way of showing her personality.  She has A LOT of personality too, let me tell you.  She is the smiliest little baby, unless it's time to go to sleep, which she really dislikes.  She also gets very upset if she's done playing on the floor and you don't pick her up right away.  She has not been one to roll from one side of the floor to the other, but she's been rolling onto her belly since shortly after 3 months, and will pull herself to whatever she wants.  Zoe's love for her sister just kept growing during these months, and she learned to become quite flexible, with lots of changes.  We moved when Zoe was 4 and 1/2 month old and she was still at a place where she did not love being in the car.  So the driving to and from when we had to do that a few times was not easy.  We had the privilege of staying with my grandma for almost a week while we were looking for a place to live in our new town.  The girls loved their Great Grandma/"GeeGee's" house, and it was fun to get to spend that extended time for her.  But it was a little crazy too, as two little one's in a non-child proofed home can be a little hard on their mama. ;)  We moved to our new place, had some rental house issues to work out, which was stressful to say the least, and just the process of unpacking, moving, creating new routines.  But the girls were champs and we played and played.  I have worked so very hard since Zoe was born to keep doing special things with her and Selah, no matter how crazy it's been.  Because even when the stress is high and the to-do list is long, I don't want to miss out on precious memories!

Zoe has been told her whole life that she is SO CUTE!  And she is told this by everyone!  That only got more fun and easy to do during those sweet months because she just smiles, crinkles up her nose, and is so easy to make giggle.  If she hears her daddy making her sister laugh she will twist her whole body around so fast just to see, then she starts laughing right along like she's part of the fun.  Every single morning, without fail, both girls have to see each other first thing.  Zoe smiles so big when her sister comes to give her hugs.  She has always had the most amazing cheeks, and has received too many kisses to count...just so amazingly irresistible!!  At 4 and 5 months old Zoe took lots of walks in my carrier, to the park, to our downtown, at the grocery store, during story time at the library or Barnes and Noble.  She did a lot of hanging out and going with the flow!  I love the memory of one of the first times she was in the nursery at our new church.  I was a little nervous, but when I came to get her she heard my voice, whipped her head around and smiled so big.  And she was sitting in a Bumbo, which we don't have, and it was before she was sitting up on her own.  So she looked so big and I got one of those overwhelming, "She's mine," proud mommy moments.  I just love her little 'zest for life' heart.

 I will say she still was not a great napper at at home at this time, which was tough for me.  (She always slept great in the Pikkolo when we were out and about;) So many days I felt like I just needed somewhat of a break.  My babies needed so much at this time, and Selah wasn't quite having full conversations or communicating as fully then.  I think that's all why it's kind of a blur.  We were just living and loving hard, trying to sleep when possible and recover from the exhaustion of getting adjusted and acclimating to a new place.   The days were flying by fast!  And I might have stayed up most of the night to finish details for sister Selah's 2nd birthday, which didn't do me any favors on the energy front. :)  I usually have what I consider to be a pretty good memory, even with the details, but wow...those first two months of Indiana with two babies and a husband with a new job were crazy.  And we didn't even have our dog with us at that time!

You know how some kids require singing, dancing, and standing on your head to get them to smile one demand? (that's Selah;)  Well not Zoe.  She practically gives you the biggest smile just for looking at her!  And if you talk to her in a sweet voice or give her a big smile, she just cannot resist.  It's such a precious trait of her's, to smile and laugh so big and easily.  It is seriously infectious around here.  We all love to make our baby Zoe smile!

Zoe honestly just loves love.  I know that sounds like a normal baby thing, but for this girl - it's serious. She thrives in every way on affection and the attention of her loved ones.  This has been true since the second they laid her on my chest in the hospital.  It's actually amazing to see how she showed us who she is during her first moments.  This is fun in the way that she is thrilled to be spent time with in anyway.  Meaning she's always like it when we sing to her, or read her books, or talk to her.  Even from a little bitty age.  Which has always been so sweet to me.  When she is happy, she is the happiest little thing without a care in the world.  But when she's not, she is my little firecracker.  I mean for real.  This girl has spunk and spice for days!  This mostly shows itself at sleeping times, in the carseat, or when she is ready to be picked up.  Sometimes it's seriously like two totally different babies.  But she is always calmed quickly at this stage.  I know that God is going to use that fierce determination for his glory.  And I know her joy will be something special that will be a light for many.  I pray that He helps me know how to lead it well.  One thing I haven't mentioned is that Zoe moves all.the.time.  Just like in my belly!!  It's amazing.  When she is wiggling all around and in our arms I imagine those same movements in my belly and it cracks me up.  She just has to move and kick and twist and grab.  At the same time, she has always been one to lay her head on my shoulder and lean in when we're holding her.  She will just hang out in your arms looking around and taking it all in, perfectly happy.

I love you Zoe girl!  You are such a special blessing to me and I cannot imagine my life without you sweet one.